Tuesday, July 30, 2013

Seven truths about wedding planning

Eight months in, two months to go. I keep having dreams where it's the day of the wedding and nothing is done (although the quote above was a breath of fresh air!). It's go time, and I'm going to give it to you straight. If you're a bride planning your own wedding, these things are headed your way.
  1. Remind yourself over and over that what matters is you and your fiancĂ© getting married. Not the color of the linens, not whether you have real or faux china, not what favors you decide to give (or not give), not whether you have real or silk flowers, not what shoes the bridesmaids will wear – nothing is as important as you and your loved one starting your new lives together before God and your family and friends. That's why you're doing all this.
  2. Be decisive. What makes wedding planning so hard is that there are infinite options for anything you want. I'm finding I'm constantly talking around in circles about things because there is no wrong answer. It's just a matter of personal preference. You and your fiancé are the final decision-makers, so once you decide something, stick to it. Don't go back on your decision. Pick one and move forward.
  3. Another one of the hardest things about wedding planning has been the people-managing. Everyone you know will have ideas and opinions because everyone has his and her own expectations, likes, dislikes and preferences. It can wear you out trying to manage everyone's expectations. What's been working for us is telling people that yes, we'll consider their ideas — and we do. You can also delegate things that don't matter as much to you and let them be something one of your idea-givers can control and 'own.'
  4. At some point, you've got to stop coming up with new ideas. Especially if you're DIY-ing a lot of your decorations, you need to draw a line for yourself somewhere. Set limits.
  5. Delegate, delegate, delegate. All those people who've offered to help you with anything? Take them up on it. People close to you are especially happy to help you because they get to be a part of your story and your big day.
  6. One thing at a time. One thing at a time. One thing at a time.
  7. Work on something every day if you can. It doesn't have to be for a long time. Just doing something every day will help you feel like things are moving along, and you'll feel less stressed.
And if you're early in your wedding planning stages and this all sounds overwhelming, my last piece of advice would be this: When your dad offers to pay for a smaller destination wedding, take him up on it.

—Jessica Smith

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